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Buy this lovely couch and change your LIFE -
Okay fine, so it might not "change YOUR life" per se, but it will definitely free up more room in my garage, allowing me to park my freaking vehicle inside of it. And THAT, my friends? Will change my life. Gone will be the days when I have to send my poor husband outside to start my vehicle to blast the AC prior to my driving away in it. This preemptive action keeps my makeup from immediately running down my face upon entering my stifling vehicle. Then there is also the other little issue of flame broiling my internal organs, because instead of living in Dallas, I apparently missed the memo that I actually live in the bowels of HELL.
Those of you that live here surely can feel my pain. So basically, it's time for the couch to go. We've been storing this lovely piece in our garage for the better part of 2 years thanks to my Mother. I refuse to get into the reasons WHY, but lets just say she lives about 7 hrs away and loves to shop on Craigslist in Dallas. So she buys things, and when she decides that she doesn't want what she bought, we get caught storing said item. Nice right? I SO can't wait until I pick out her nursing home. She will pay dearly, trust me.
Anyway, it's a fabulous couch. Very comfy and stylish and whatnot. I don't think anyone was killed on it or anything. There are no hypodermic needles stored in the couch cushions that I can see. If I had a place for it in my house I would probably use it. Of course I would steam clean it prior using it since it's been in my garage, but still.
So who wants it? Email me if you're interested. Oh, and to the fellow that lives in Nigeria, no you can't have it. I also do not plan on delivering this couch to anyone in the DFW area. Sorry. I want it gone, but not quite that badly.
One more thing. Cash only. :)
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20 comments:
Oh to have a car in the garage, heaven, just heaven. A few months out of the year I can get the internal organs melting thing, but to not have to scrap snow off the car would be wonderful.
So no, I guess I don't want your couch. Sorry. Would you like the bath tub I have in my garage by any chance?
You could never have done that with the old-school classified ads. Would've cost more than a new sofa.
I hadn't thought of using craigslist for unwanted furniture. I just use it for hookers.
Sounds so tempting. I bet there are a dozen Nigerians swooning at the thought of getting your couch after they change your mind about accepting a company check. Stay strong. Would a picture help or hinder your cause? I think a shot of Candice with melty make up would pull at America's heartstrings....
Sue- Um, I think I'm all good on bath tubs at the moment. I'll let you know if that changes.
Jack Shit- I treat my hookers with more respect. They get the "good" indoor furniture.
Sometimes Sophia- Yeah, I doubt a melty makeup picture of me looking all pissed off would help. In fact, I think it would scare off any potential buyers.
I heard that you can do a lot of things with a couch: sit on it, drop food on it, sleep on it, let the dog sleep on it, sit your keg of beer next to it, at least three hot-looking ladies with poms poms can stretch out on it, and maybe even the fridge for that matter.
if you were sexily displayed and scantily clad on it in the pic you'd get more responses!
Cash only? Damn. I was going to offer to trade you my miniature log cabin made out of popsicle sticks for the couch. Oh well. Cheers!!
Craigslist is amazing. Just when I think I could never pawn that ridiculous Ikea chair that no one would ever want to sit in for 75% of what I paid for it 5 years ago, BAM! Yesterday I gave away a bunch of packing peanuts and had like 52 responses of people who were in dire need of them. Insane.
lindsay || newyorkwords.net
For the move to Spain, I used consignment shops for the good furniture and had a house sale for the rest. I wanted to just give everything away, but my wife said no. I thought it would be a waste of time.
We made over 6 thousand dollars. That was with no good furniture, just electronics and stuff. So if you can’t sell it on Craiglist, or if too many homicidal maniacs or stalkers annoy you, try a good old fashioned garage sale! You could get rid of more things you don’t need!!
No Syringes? What are you, Mormon?
i wish i HAD a garage... and that ad makes the couch seem so...irresistible.
We sold my old kitchen range on Craigslist this week, and also my husband's old power washer that didn't work, but still had a good motor. I love Craigslist. I don't get as creative as you with my ads, though. I think you're trying to make "Best of Craigslist". Right?
be sure to check between the cushions for snaks, loose coinage or lost jewelry before letting it go
OMG!!
Candice your blog is the funniest thing I have read in ages!! Thank you.
Ann Marie
Austin
My only problem with Craig's List is that people are now selling their used stuff instead of just setting it out next to the dumpsters at apartment complexes for me to pick up and use to furnish my own place.
Chris- Yes! You can do all of the and MORE. Want my couch?
Southern Sage- Brent wasn't here to take my picture. Just my kids. That would have been a bit weird, don't you think? Wait. Don't answer that.
Matt-Man- Can I recant?
Lindsay- And that's why I love Craigslist.
Scott- I've been threatening to have a garage sale. In fact, my whole living room is crammed full of shit for one. I just need to tag it and actually have it. Unfortunately its too fucking hot for that kind of activity.
Jaime- So what you're saying is that you want my couch?
Donna- Holy shit, there is a "best of craigslist"? Now I have a goal in life! ;)
Nooter- I'll get Brent to do it. Thanks for the tip!
Ann Marie- I'm blushing. Thanks!
Jay- That sucks for you. Sign up for freecycle and get your stuff that way.
You and me both, sister... living in the bowels of hell, that is. Did you miss that small print on the brochure?
Can't wait to hear about your responses, which I'm absolutely expecting you to share. There are no idiots like the ones we have in TX.
Foxy- No. I missed the fine print apparently.
Candice, if Craigs list doesn't work, you can put it in your front yard as lawn furniture. I have an old toilet that you can plant flowers in and sit it next to it.
Im just sayin. :)
Danielle- I'm sure the neighbors would love that idea! ;)
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