Comments on Life According To Candice: If you think your Monday sucks, try going to the O...

No, my day was worse than yours. After a lump? was...

2009-10-28T05:41:44.493-05:00

No, my day was worse than yours.
After a lump? was found on physical exam, I went for a mammogram, a bilateral ultrasound. Then they call me back on the 19th Oct for another 2 mammograms (the 1st not being clear enough) then another ultrasound and then to top off my 6 1/2 hour day at the womens centre, a biopsy. By the end of that, I was starting to think about a full blown panic attack. Not

Peg- Because he can, that's why. Shut him down a t...

2009-10-20T11:06:23.589-05:00

Peg- Because he can, that's why. Shut him down a time or two. Perhaps even chomp down on that shit and claim you were still dreaming. That might put a stop to that bullshit.

Ron- I thought you said anal visit at first, and yes, I was there for my anal visit.

Foxy- I'm anti-male OBGYN for some reason.

Mike- Ha. I bet.

FreakSmack- Now you know

It really is better than a finger up the ass thoug...

2009-10-20T08:48:50.728-05:00

It really is better than a finger up the ass though. :)

PS - I tagged you on my blog!

I actually do own a vagina wallet--bought it on Et...

2009-10-20T06:16:13.589-05:00

I actually do own a vagina wallet--bought it on Etsy. It doesn't see much action these day either.

You poor thing. I don't like ANYBODY poking me "ea...

2009-10-20T02:50:04.342-05:00

You poor thing. I don't like ANYBODY poking me "early in the morning". They might get an eye scratched out.

But don't you feel better now that it's all over...just asking.

Wait, is your handbag the same thing as your lady ...

2009-10-20T01:39:25.528-05:00

Wait, is your handbag the same thing as your lady wallet? Cause if you are going to beat someone to death with it, you should really get that shit down on video. You know, for posterity. And maybe for sale??

And that's reason #32 in my upcoming book "Reasons...

2009-10-19T23:10:25.165-05:00

And that's reason #32 in my upcoming book "Reasons I'm Glad I'm Not a Chick".

It's stories like those that make me feel fortunat...

2009-10-19T21:47:07.761-05:00

It's stories like those that make me feel fortunate to be a man. I'll never loathe a Monday again.

I have a friend who almost came to blows with the ...

2009-10-19T21:08:09.718-05:00

I have a friend who almost came to blows with the nurse at her gyno's office because she refused to get on the scale.

Y'know... it occurs to me that you're a nurse. You...

2009-10-19T20:56:15.835-05:00

Y'know... it occurs to me that you're a nurse. You of all people should appreciate the value of preventative maintenance, if for no other reason than you're constantly exposed to what happens without it. So, quitcher bitchin'! [grin]

What I'd like to hear are some of the funny stories about your patients. Or, at least the stories around the water cooler

You win. Your Monday sucked far more than mine did...

2009-10-19T19:37:43.370-05:00

You win. Your Monday sucked far more than mine did.

Gyno visits are the worse. Besides the leakage yo...

2009-10-19T15:45:08.614-05:00

Gyno visits are the worse. Besides the leakage you mentioned I hate, HATE when they make me scoot down more on the paper.

"Scoot down."
"A little more."
"Just a little more."
"Ah that's it now that you've torn the 'sanitary' paper and have your ass hanging in the air."

...okay so I made up the last

Stories like this make me glad my wallet resides i...

2009-10-19T15:18:47.076-05:00

Stories like this make me glad my wallet resides in my pocket, and I haven't had to cough since I played sports in high school. I also decided to sleep in today.

Well if I have my vagina poked and prodded any mor...

2009-10-19T14:43:09.446-05:00

Well if I have my vagina poked and prodded any morning I'd have bigger problems.

Leaking KY the rest of the day is right... that's ...

2009-10-19T14:24:48.639-05:00

Leaking KY the rest of the day is right... that's the worst thing about that appt!! Well, for me anyway. Maybe that's because my dr is a hottie. :)

Okay, in comparison, my Monday doesn't seem as bad...

2009-10-19T14:05:23.940-05:00

Okay, in comparison, my Monday doesn't seem as bad.

Should I assume you were there for an annual visit, or do you have news to share with all of us reading your blog?

I can beat you hands down but won't bore you with ...

2009-10-19T13:08:22.368-05:00

I can beat you hands down but won't bore you with it here. Suffice it to say, though, that my day started roughly the same as yours although i was warm and cozy in happy dreamland when the poking and prodding started here. Why TF does being in the same GD bed mean it's OK to wake us up when the mood strikes?

Queen Mama- Thanks for the thoughts. I survived an...

2009-10-19T13:01:52.014-05:00

Queen Mama- Thanks for the thoughts. I survived and I remain intact. ;)

Orah- It was a party. A party in my vagina. Whoo-f...

2009-10-19T13:00:55.374-05:00

Orah- It was a party. A party in my vagina. Whoo-freaking-hoo!

Snugs- Now I like that idea!

Shanni- Okay, so fine. Your Monday sucks worse than mine. ;)

Lee- It's big enough that I could totally knock her out with it if enough force is applied.

Senorita- Hair gel dispenser! That's a pretty good way to put it. Very accurate!

Another day of hilarious-ness (if thats even a wor...

2009-10-19T12:49:02.773-05:00

Another day of hilarious-ness (if thats even a word, oh well).

I hate going to the doctor too, that doctor anyways. That KY is horrible. I will be thinking of you today.

And... I won't begin to complain about my Monday ;)

I'm thinking like you are, let's save the KY for t...

2009-10-19T12:30:15.132-05:00

I'm thinking like you are, let's save the KY for the good dtuff, tonite!

Secretia

I need to change my major from Phys Ed. to Pre-Med...

2009-10-19T12:22:50.400-05:00

I need to change my major from Phys Ed. to Pre-Med with the goal to become an OB/GYN. I am not a breast man. I prefer the downside of a woman :)

I thought women became more bothered women mens ey...

2009-10-19T12:09:35.720-05:00

I thought women became more bothered women mens eyes no longer roamed in their direction?

I guess there is a bright side there for you.

The other bright side is that you do not have to go often.

Joy! Look on the bright side, it can only get bet...

2009-10-19T12:02:58.567-05:00

Joy! Look on the bright side, it can only get better from there...

Lady Wallet....LMAO Have fun! and if it makes you...

2009-10-19T11:49:13.940-05:00

Lady Wallet....LMAO

Have fun! and if it makes you feel ANY better, I have a freakish leftover suture trying to escape to the outside world, poking OUT of my VaJayJay.....I would rather go for the normal poke session than deal with this stitch constantly. Ouch.
Just saying.